This blog keeps evolving in good or bad ways. It started with my Coleman lantern collecting obsession (The Lantern). Then it slipped into Kansas camping (Of Oz). I didn’t realize “Oz” referred to Australia, so I regret the name of my blog because I doubt folks are picking up on my Kansas-Dorothy-Wizard connection. I digress. I like to write about my camping trips, my fishing adventures, and sometimes my absolute nasty depressed mind and things there within. I have a very negative mindset about Life and I try to not let that out. Camping culture and dirtbag lifestyle make me happy. I love the bandanna republic. Lastly, I rarely read comments unless they are from people I know, I’m sorry it’s just the way I am. Thanks for reading, I hope I post things that people “get” or appreciate
And then it happened: I found the tent that will prevent me from buying any other tent forevermore. Introducing the Kelty Caboose 4 — a 4-Person tent that connects to your vehicle, providing shelter, shade, and comfort. I absolutely love this idea because if it ever rains, I would be able to literally pack up all of my camping gear without getting wet! The only thing that would be wet would be the tent itself, which is no big deal. If I had this tent on my last camping trip, when it was crushing rain when I was packing up — I’d simply have opened the hatch of my 4Runner, and under the protection of the tent, easily packed up all of my blankets, pillows, and other gear in the tent and packed it into the vehicle. Staying dry the entire time! Here’s another great thing:
It’s a stand-alone tent in and of itself. It doesn’t have to attach to your vehicle. And look at that vestibule! If it rains, again, you are safe and sound. I can make coffee in the vestibule area with a full-size camp chair, and my Coleman table.
I am basically frothing at the mouth to own this tent. I’m quite amazed that I didn’t drunk-purchase it last night. I’m pretty sure that’s the next step, I know it will happen, sadly. This tent is perfect for how I camp, and I cannot wait to own it.
it’s a Saturday. Blue skies. Only a breeze for wind. Temps reaching low 80’s. Our loser, Latrans, was fuming. The only perfect camping weekend of the year. He was mowing his weed-filled lawn at the moment — 9 a.m. and a few brews under his breath.
No worries — camping just makes him feel guilty. Latrans feels nothing but emotion — child of divorce (6years old), but it contradicts his OCD concrete-sequential behavior.
Latrans is not present. But the lawn is mowed. The weeds.
He has nothing to say. He only talks to himself.
Latrans spends too much money in the wrong places. He has enough camping gear to live off the land for ….
The 60-hour work weeks are washing him away, like a bar of soap in the shower.
But he will do it still. Cavalry bones in boots. Frazier says Budweiser is the beer of the reservation.
Last September, when I purchased my Toyota 4Runner (TEQ), I think I sold my soul. I signed the paperwork in my own blood, and made a promise to myself that I would do anything, at all costs, to pay for this thing. I am currently working 60 hours a week, and I don’t even mind, it’s all for the cause. And so on the first of each month, I celebrate making my TEQ Pakkuraba payment by drinking Kirin Ichiban — a lovely Japanese rice lager.
When I get to do this at the sacred lake, it’s even more special. Anyway, this weekend was a rare two-nighter. The weird thing is I did a two-nighter on this weekend last year as well. I remember because the Friday I arrived was on Cinco de Mayo. This year Cinco de Mayo was/is on Sunday, and I left in the pouring rain:
I can tell you this is every camping nightmare imagined. My idea of fun doesn’t involve putting away a tent in the rain, but I managed: I left the rainfly on it as I took the poles down from the inside, then I simply folded it up and put it in a trash bag:
I have to admit it worked well, but now I have to figure out how to dry a 4-person tent at home with no sun expected until Tuesday. That was the worst of it, the rest of the weekend was, despite the overcast skies, quite lovely.
Friday evening got a little dicey, as I stabbed my left big toe with a stick and almost bled out. When I eventually do die, I’d like to die doing what I love, which is camping, so I almost did that. Just another war story … I patched my toe up, which is not the first toe injury I’ve had at the campsite. I’m becoming good at fixing bloody toes. I digress.
Saturday morning, the flood gates opened — literally. The spillway at the sacred lake was gushing because of recent flooding. I have been waiting to fish the spillway for two years, and I finally got my chance, only to catch zero fish.
The garfish were everywhere. They did not want my homemade rope lure. They surfaced like submarines constantly. Maybe next time … I miss catching Teri Garfish.
I made my way back to camp and tried a new camp meal idea: Johnsonville pre-cooked smoked brats with diced potatoes. I had to pair it with the official camping brew of Charles Latrans: Coors Banquet. Honestly, I liked this meal. Extremely cheap, extremely easy. That’s what camping meals should be. Latrans is a meat-and-potatoes kinda guy. Always.
The Pakkuraba got some jewelry — the Trasharoo from 4Runner Lifestyle. It’s brilliant. It’s made to fit over the spare tire, but pakku’s spare is underneath, but it still works great on the Gobi ladder. In fact I left it on and drove 20 miles down dirt roads and it didn’t flap or rattle or move at all. What it does is offer a place to haul your trash when you leave the campsite. So your spouse won’t have to hold the trash bag on the way to the nearest dumpster (lol).
The Kelty Waypoint tarp is reborn! I used to love this thing on my previous Jeep Patriot. I was only able to use it on Shi after installing the Gobi roof rack, but it works. The only down side, if there is one, is that the back hatch of the 4R doesn’t stay up very well when opening it, because of the weight of the ladder and the tightness of the tarp. But, the hatch can be opened for access to the back of the Japanese pack mule if needed. I might need to find some kind of retractable pole to use to prop the hatch with.
Lastly, I leave you with this image. I noticed something disturbing when I looked at it this morning, do you see it? Look at the sky …
Apparently, during last night’s campfire, the ghost of my cat Louis was staring down at me from Heaven. I see a cat, his eye, the bridge of his nose … I literally don’t know what this is, but it’s probably why people believe in UFO’s. Weird glitches, reflections, shit in the air. Or, my cat’s ghost face staring straight into my soul ….
Type “Yuzonc sleeping pad” into Amazon search and you’ll find this cheap pad for $27.98. It has over 2,000 reviews for a 4.4 out of 5 average. Well, I’m going to give it 2 stars. Let me explain.
Like some other sleep pads, this one is one you air up by stepping on a pad. It took 73 steps, it was pretty easy.
It has a built-in “pillow” as you can see. Well, it’s very comfortable and I liked it a lot until I woke up in the morning to a flat pad. It leaked. So I aired it up and tried again on my two-nighter. Same thing, woke up to a flat pad. Oh well, you can’t win them all. I do have a glimmer of hope — maybe the nozzles weren’t shut tight, I don’t know. I have it aired up now, I’ll see if it eventually leaks again. On to the next one …
Charles Latrans is a OCD drunkard. He likes to have a matching glass with his beer. Well, so many years ago he settled on Busch beer as his joy. Bought the glass. This morning, strangely, Charles had a thought — what if this glass broke. They all do eventually, but this one has lasted years.
What a premonition. It broke. It broke, because things break. But Latrans knows it broke because he thought about it.
Latrans is dying. He is working harder, longer, for less. He’s thankful to be an American, glad to be here. But he’s a slave and it’s eating away his life. Is 60 hours of pain worth 24 hours of ….
Don’t know. Charles never does it right. He’s more of an Edward Abbey type — the worse father figure. Just gets away to camp.
Charles will look on the internet for a new glass, a new $4 soul.
Kansas, My Kansas. I love you so. Prevailing southerly winds. Blue skies. Rolling hills. Post oak savanna. Prairie grass. Coyotes. Gravel roads. Black cattle. Sandstone. Limestone. Olive-colored lakes. I fucking love you. Pakku got a good taste of Kansas yesterday. I almost — almost took her on an actual trail, but I chickened out. I have a very low amount of trail confidence, in fact I have none. She will teach me slowly, we’ll get there one day.
My Detroit Tigers lid came with me, as well as the current book I’m reading about Ty Cobb — the fucking best baseball player in the history of the game and I’ll argue that forever. What a man. I’m reading the book because apparently he is known worldwide as a fucking asshole racist, a real bad dude. Only 4 people from baseball went to his funeral, if that gives you an idea of how disliked he was. BUT — this book refutes these things … Ty Cobb was not all of those bad things. Anyway. Great reading so far. Back to camping …
Those prevailing southerlies did come, but overall it was a gorgeous weekend full of blue skies and sunny warmth. My arms were soaked in the holy Hawaiian Tropic SPF 30 sunscreen. The aroma of coconut, frozen shrimp (bait), and Deep Woods Off mesmerized me. Lunch time came and I decided to eat cheap — bean quesadillas and cilantro-lime rice from the package.
Refried beans and cheddar-jack cheese. I brought diced jalapeños but did not add those, sadly. The meal was okay but very uninspiring. I’ll try better next time. After I cleaned up camp, I took Pakku to a special place …
It’s a river crossing with a history I have not researched yet, but it is a good 20 mile trek down gravel roads out in the proverbial Middle Of Nowhere. The river is clean and beautiful, with its limestone bed.
I tried to get as dirty as possible. Baptized by Kansas. Later in the afternoon I took a shower at the bathhouse, still one of the best things ever.
I had to camp at my old campsite where I’d camped 32 times before. I didn’t really plan on it, but I pulled in Saturday morning and found my first two choices occupied. It always freaks me out when that happens but Plan C worked fine, it was nice to be back at the ol’ home.
I have 3 more trips planned before we go to Colorado for my 100th trip. I could probably sneak in an extra trip before then but I want Colorado to be 100.
The only down side to the weekend is Pakkuraba’s gas mileage. She barely got 17 mpg on the way to the lake, and only 15.7 mpg on the way home. Yikes! I’m guessing with three kids, a 70-pound dog, and my beautiful wife and even more camping gear, our Colorado trip will be insanely horrible — 12.5, 13 mpg? I better start saving money now LOL.
Arlo still waiting for his first Campout this year …. Maybe next time, buddy.
For just around $40 you can get the TOBTOS sleep pad on Amazon. It inflates to an incredible 6 inches (that’s what she said) so let’s talk about it.
To inflate it, you simply open the nozzle on the foot pad, while making sure the nozzle on the other end is closed. Then you step on the pad, which pushes air into the pad. It took me exactly 64 steps to get it fully inflated, and while I think it was slightly annoying, it’s way better that blowing air into it with your mouth. It can also be inflated with an air pump but that’s cheating, right? Here’s the final product:
They weren’t lying — it’s 6 inches thick. One end has a built-in “pillow” which is nice. It stayed aired up all night, and it was comfortable. The material feels really cheap, I have to admit. I’m not sure how many nights this will last before getting a hole poked in it, but I’m sure it’s worth the price paid. Also, deflating it and rolling it up into its stuff sack is really easy. I’ll give this 4.5 stars out of 5, I just worry about the thin material is all. Once again I am proving that you don’t need to spend $200 on those ridiculous sleep pads made by the good camping companies. In a pinch, you can sleep comfortably for under $40.
Any time I cancel a camping trip the last minute, it always feels weird. But as it is, the forecast called for 30 mph winds, gusts up to 50 mph, then possible severe weather in late evening. There’s just no point. I finally called it.
The Pakkuraba, however, licked up the scraps and got dressed with a proper saddle. The Gobi roof rack from Denver, Colorado has been sitting in the garage for a few weeks awaiting appointment. I started at 8 a.m. with good coffee and finished at 7:00 p.m. with beer. Not bad for a 2-hour task.
The big concern was the garage. Would it fit? Because that’s why I sold my old Thule rack, it was too tall. Thank Christ it fit, by 4-5 inches. Because when you order a 70-pound rack that’s delivered on a pallet from a freight company, you can’t just send it back.
The instructions by Gobi were nothing less than amazing, except for the ladder install, but no worries. We figured it. The icing on the cake is the Gobi backpack. It’s an option on the order, so for $50 I was like yeah. Turns out it’s probably a $100 backpack, high quality —
I’ve seen shitty backpacks at Target that cost more — this thing is fucking awesome. I’ll use it on camping trips, another pakkuraba pocket.
Maybe next weekend I’ll get away from my slime city. Jerk city. People city.
My new religion, my new sin, is nearing its completion. And let me re-iterate this first — I feel disgusting posting things like this. I am not a materialistic guy, I hate showing things off. I’m a T-shirt and jeans guy who keeps the same t-shirts for decades. I do, however, love camping gear, I’ll show that stuff off because it’s generally affordable. Posting things about vehicles feels different. But I’m only doing this in the name of Camping.
My wife told me once that I need to stop compromising, if you want something then go for it and get what you really want. A few months ago on a camping trip I read this billboard at a small town community center that read: “I’m stuck between save for the future and you only live once.” And that, that sums up a lot of my thinking. However, I’ve decided to throw all of my cards on the table. I might die tomorrow. My plan for my Nihon no Pakkuraba (Japanese pack mule) was to slowly add mods over a 3-4 year period. Responsibly pay off each addition before adding the next. Nope. Fuck it, scorched earth policy is in effect.
Anyway, her new Easter shoes are BF Goodrich KO2. The important thing was the TRD black wheels. These should be mandatory stock, but Toyota wouldn’t make money on that. It sucks to replace brand new tires and wheels after only 6K miles, but by God the difference is profound. But now, finally, I can go to the real backwoods, I can finally drive up to Mirror Lake without worrying about ripping off a gas tank or getting a tire puncture. And now I can explore, and go “overlanding” in earnest. And for this, I must ask my God to forgive me for my sins of my Japanese pack mule worship.
The Gobi roof rack is in the garage awaiting install, which I will have to do myself in a few weeks. I would like to add a few more things, but am in no hurry — an awning, some outside Molle panels with gas/water carriers, and maybe some smoked out tail lights. Maybe, just maybe a leveling kit — but for now she is done.
I’ve never had a bucket list, because in a sad, weird way, I think bucket lists are depressing. I love the idea, but it seems like most bucket lists are things people will never achieve but dream of, of course. Hey, dreaming is free, after all. But I’m more of a literal guy, I need attainable goals. Over the last 3 years, a bucket list has been created in my life, and it has one item on it, and only one. Well, maybe two. But target #1 is visiting the Battle of the Little Bighorn National Monument in Montana. I have been meticulously reading about this subject for 2-3 years now, and I’ve reached the too-late-to-turn-back moment now. I need to see where Custer breathed his last breath, where the Sioux wiped out the 7th Cavalry. Where, where … once upon a time, life was untamed and natural. Cowboys and Indians and cavalry. This is the culture I am in love with. The 19th Century. Fuck technology.
So this summer, God willing, I’m planning on taking my wife and dog on the 15-hour roadie to the Crow Reservation in southwestern Montana to visit the sacred battlefield. We will camp along the way at a white sand beach lake in Nebraska — surreal. We might camp in the Big Horn mountains in Wyoming. I still need to do logistics. It’ll be a “quick” 4-day trip, the only cost will be fuel and food, so this won’t be too costly ($3.19 per gallon for 1,000 miles, fuck my life). LOL
Life is moving too fast. 60-hour workweeks are normal now. The camping rabbit hole goes deeper and deeper through my soul. The bucket list might grow. My wife and I want to move to Texas. But like I said, these bucket list items seem too hard to reach sometimes. One day at a time.
I’m a REI Co-op member, and I get rewards or discounts from time to time. If you have an REI near you, please sign up for $10, it’s the best thing you’ll ever do. In fact I think when you sign up you get a $10 coupon immediately, so it’s free. Anyway, sometimes I check out their app, and last week I stumbled upon a Mountsinsmith Lichen 2-P tent for $80, marked down from $219. For $80, I absolutely had to have it. I liked the vestibule it has, but I’ll talk about that in a bit. It packs up fairly small, standing on end it doesn’t even reach my knee. I’m not tall either.
Right off the bat, you can see it comes with very sturdy, high-quality stakes. I prefer these shepherd’s hook style, as opposed to any other kind. The tent does come with a ground mat. I do need to mention that they don’t provide enough stakes — if you want the two guy lines to be staked, you’ll need to bring a few extra.
Putting the rain fly on is easy enough, but you should secure it with the Velcro points before putting the rest of it in place, will make it easier later.
As a 2-Person tent, it’s basically a 1-Person tent, but that’s always the case with tents. Always subtract one from the size stated. Now let’s talk about the vestibule.
The photo online makes this vestibule look huge, but it’s not. That’s my full-sized camp chair there, and clearly I get no protection, but as far as storing gear and such, the vestibule area is great. Backpacks and other things will easily fit.
My two cents worth: This is a pretty well-made tent. It took me 23 minutes to pitch it, which is me doing it for the first time and not reading directions (I never do anyway). I’m sure next time I can cut a lot of time off. There are a lot of stake points, it should be stable in wind, it was for me and I live in Kansas, which is basically a wind tunnel.
Personally, I felt like it was kinda cramped, but I’m the weirdo who likes to sleep in 4-Person tents when I’m solo. I love space. I don’t like the tunnel-style tent that starts high and descends. But I’m just not used to that style.
I like this tent, I will be using it again. It’s just not a this-is-the-one tent. Getting this thing for $80 felt like a gift from the camping gods, for sure. Mountainsmith is a company from Colorado, yet the tent is made in China. That kinda disturbs me. Last but not least, I folded up this tent and packed it into its stuff sack at the campsite on a breezy morning. I felt pretty great about that. Some tents are way more difficult.
The Lantern of Oz 