And then it happened: I found the tent that will prevent me from buying any other tent forevermore. Introducing the Kelty Caboose 4 — a 4-Person tent that connects to your vehicle, providing shelter, shade, and comfort. I absolutely love this idea because if it ever rains, I would be able to literally pack up all of my camping gear without getting wet! The only thing that would be wet would be the tent itself, which is no big deal. If I had this tent on my last camping trip, when it was crushing rain when I was packing up — I’d simply have opened the hatch of my 4Runner, and under the protection of the tent, easily packed up all of my blankets, pillows, and other gear in the tent and packed it into the vehicle. Staying dry the entire time! Here’s another great thing:
It’s a stand-alone tent in and of itself. It doesn’t have to attach to your vehicle. And look at that vestibule! If it rains, again, you are safe and sound. I can make coffee in the vestibule area with a full-size camp chair, and my Coleman table.
I am basically frothing at the mouth to own this tent. I’m quite amazed that I didn’t drunk-purchase it last night. I’m pretty sure that’s the next step, I know it will happen, sadly. This tent is perfect for how I camp, and I cannot wait to own it.
Last September, when I purchased my Toyota 4Runner (TEQ), I think I sold my soul. I signed the paperwork in my own blood, and made a promise to myself that I would do anything, at all costs, to pay for this thing. I am currently working 60 hours a week, and I don’t even mind, it’s all for the cause. And so on the first of each month, I celebrate making my TEQ Pakkuraba payment by drinking Kirin Ichiban — a lovely Japanese rice lager.
When I get to do this at the sacred lake, it’s even more special. Anyway, this weekend was a rare two-nighter. The weird thing is I did a two-nighter on this weekend last year as well. I remember because the Friday I arrived was on Cinco de Mayo. This year Cinco de Mayo was/is on Sunday, and I left in the pouring rain:
I can tell you this is every camping nightmare imagined. My idea of fun doesn’t involve putting away a tent in the rain, but I managed: I left the rainfly on it as I took the poles down from the inside, then I simply folded it up and put it in a trash bag:
I have to admit it worked well, but now I have to figure out how to dry a 4-person tent at home with no sun expected until Tuesday. That was the worst of it, the rest of the weekend was, despite the overcast skies, quite lovely.
Friday evening got a little dicey, as I stabbed my left big toe with a stick and almost bled out. When I eventually do die, I’d like to die doing what I love, which is camping, so I almost did that. Just another war story … I patched my toe up, which is not the first toe injury I’ve had at the campsite. I’m becoming good at fixing bloody toes. I digress.
Saturday morning, the flood gates opened — literally. The spillway at the sacred lake was gushing because of recent flooding. I have been waiting to fish the spillway for two years, and I finally got my chance, only to catch zero fish.
The garfish were everywhere. They did not want my homemade rope lure. They surfaced like submarines constantly. Maybe next time … I miss catching Teri Garfish.
I made my way back to camp and tried a new camp meal idea: Johnsonville pre-cooked smoked brats with diced potatoes. I had to pair it with the official camping brew of Charles Latrans: Coors Banquet. Honestly, I liked this meal. Extremely cheap, extremely easy. That’s what camping meals should be. Latrans is a meat-and-potatoes kinda guy. Always.
The Pakkuraba got some jewelry — the Trasharoo from 4Runner Lifestyle. It’s brilliant. It’s made to fit over the spare tire, but pakku’s spare is underneath, but it still works great on the Gobi ladder. In fact I left it on and drove 20 miles down dirt roads and it didn’t flap or rattle or move at all. What it does is offer a place to haul your trash when you leave the campsite. So your spouse won’t have to hold the trash bag on the way to the nearest dumpster (lol).
The Kelty Waypoint tarp is reborn! I used to love this thing on my previous Jeep Patriot. I was only able to use it on Shi after installing the Gobi roof rack, but it works. The only down side, if there is one, is that the back hatch of the 4R doesn’t stay up very well when opening it, because of the weight of the ladder and the tightness of the tarp. But, the hatch can be opened for access to the back of the Japanese pack mule if needed. I might need to find some kind of retractable pole to use to prop the hatch with.
Lastly, I leave you with this image. I noticed something disturbing when I looked at it this morning, do you see it? Look at the sky …
Apparently, during last night’s campfire, the ghost of my cat Louis was staring down at me from Heaven. I see a cat, his eye, the bridge of his nose … I literally don’t know what this is, but it’s probably why people believe in UFO’s. Weird glitches, reflections, shit in the air. Or, my cat’s ghost face staring straight into my soul ….
Kansas, My Kansas. I love you so. Prevailing southerly winds. Blue skies. Rolling hills. Post oak savanna. Prairie grass. Coyotes. Gravel roads. Black cattle. Sandstone. Limestone. Olive-colored lakes. I fucking love you. Pakku got a good taste of Kansas yesterday. I almost — almost took her on an actual trail, but I chickened out. I have a very low amount of trail confidence, in fact I have none. She will teach me slowly, we’ll get there one day.
My Detroit Tigers lid came with me, as well as the current book I’m reading about Ty Cobb — the fucking best baseball player in the history of the game and I’ll argue that forever. What a man. I’m reading the book because apparently he is known worldwide as a fucking asshole racist, a real bad dude. Only 4 people from baseball went to his funeral, if that gives you an idea of how disliked he was. BUT — this book refutes these things … Ty Cobb was not all of those bad things. Anyway. Great reading so far. Back to camping …
Those prevailing southerlies did come, but overall it was a gorgeous weekend full of blue skies and sunny warmth. My arms were soaked in the holy Hawaiian Tropic SPF 30 sunscreen. The aroma of coconut, frozen shrimp (bait), and Deep Woods Off mesmerized me. Lunch time came and I decided to eat cheap — bean quesadillas and cilantro-lime rice from the package.
Refried beans and cheddar-jack cheese. I brought diced jalapeños but did not add those, sadly. The meal was okay but very uninspiring. I’ll try better next time. After I cleaned up camp, I took Pakku to a special place …
It’s a river crossing with a history I have not researched yet, but it is a good 20 mile trek down gravel roads out in the proverbial Middle Of Nowhere. The river is clean and beautiful, with its limestone bed.
I tried to get as dirty as possible. Baptized by Kansas. Later in the afternoon I took a shower at the bathhouse, still one of the best things ever.
I had to camp at my old campsite where I’d camped 32 times before. I didn’t really plan on it, but I pulled in Saturday morning and found my first two choices occupied. It always freaks me out when that happens but Plan C worked fine, it was nice to be back at the ol’ home.
I have 3 more trips planned before we go to Colorado for my 100th trip. I could probably sneak in an extra trip before then but I want Colorado to be 100.
The only down side to the weekend is Pakkuraba’s gas mileage. She barely got 17 mpg on the way to the lake, and only 15.7 mpg on the way home. Yikes! I’m guessing with three kids, a 70-pound dog, and my beautiful wife and even more camping gear, our Colorado trip will be insanely horrible — 12.5, 13 mpg? I better start saving money now LOL.
Arlo still waiting for his first Campout this year …. Maybe next time, buddy.
Any time I cancel a camping trip the last minute, it always feels weird. But as it is, the forecast called for 30 mph winds, gusts up to 50 mph, then possible severe weather in late evening. There’s just no point. I finally called it.
The Pakkuraba, however, licked up the scraps and got dressed with a proper saddle. The Gobi roof rack from Denver, Colorado has been sitting in the garage for a few weeks awaiting appointment. I started at 8 a.m. with good coffee and finished at 7:00 p.m. with beer. Not bad for a 2-hour task.
The big concern was the garage. Would it fit? Because that’s why I sold my old Thule rack, it was too tall. Thank Christ it fit, by 4-5 inches. Because when you order a 70-pound rack that’s delivered on a pallet from a freight company, you can’t just send it back.
The instructions by Gobi were nothing less than amazing, except for the ladder install, but no worries. We figured it. The icing on the cake is the Gobi backpack. It’s an option on the order, so for $50 I was like yeah. Turns out it’s probably a $100 backpack, high quality —
I’ve seen shitty backpacks at Target that cost more — this thing is fucking awesome. I’ll use it on camping trips, another pakkuraba pocket.
Maybe next weekend I’ll get away from my slime city. Jerk city. People city.
My new religion, my new sin, is nearing its completion. And let me re-iterate this first — I feel disgusting posting things like this. I am not a materialistic guy, I hate showing things off. I’m a T-shirt and jeans guy who keeps the same t-shirts for decades. I do, however, love camping gear, I’ll show that stuff off because it’s generally affordable. Posting things about vehicles feels different. But I’m only doing this in the name of Camping.
My wife told me once that I need to stop compromising, if you want something then go for it and get what you really want. A few months ago on a camping trip I read this billboard at a small town community center that read: “I’m stuck between save for the future and you only live once.” And that, that sums up a lot of my thinking. However, I’ve decided to throw all of my cards on the table. I might die tomorrow. My plan for my Nihon no Pakkuraba (Japanese pack mule) was to slowly add mods over a 3-4 year period. Responsibly pay off each addition before adding the next. Nope. Fuck it, scorched earth policy is in effect.
Anyway, her new Easter shoes are BF Goodrich KO2. The important thing was the TRD black wheels. These should be mandatory stock, but Toyota wouldn’t make money on that. It sucks to replace brand new tires and wheels after only 6K miles, but by God the difference is profound. But now, finally, I can go to the real backwoods, I can finally drive up to Mirror Lake without worrying about ripping off a gas tank or getting a tire puncture. And now I can explore, and go “overlanding” in earnest. And for this, I must ask my God to forgive me for my sins of my Japanese pack mule worship.
The Gobi roof rack is in the garage awaiting install, which I will have to do myself in a few weeks. I would like to add a few more things, but am in no hurry — an awning, some outside Molle panels with gas/water carriers, and maybe some smoked out tail lights. Maybe, just maybe a leveling kit — but for now she is done.
I’ve never had a bucket list, because in a sad, weird way, I think bucket lists are depressing. I love the idea, but it seems like most bucket lists are things people will never achieve but dream of, of course. Hey, dreaming is free, after all. But I’m more of a literal guy, I need attainable goals. Over the last 3 years, a bucket list has been created in my life, and it has one item on it, and only one. Well, maybe two. But target #1 is visiting the Battle of the Little Bighorn National Monument in Montana. I have been meticulously reading about this subject for 2-3 years now, and I’ve reached the too-late-to-turn-back moment now. I need to see where Custer breathed his last breath, where the Sioux wiped out the 7th Cavalry. Where, where … once upon a time, life was untamed and natural. Cowboys and Indians and cavalry. This is the culture I am in love with. The 19th Century. Fuck technology.
So this summer, God willing, I’m planning on taking my wife and dog on the 15-hour roadie to the Crow Reservation in southwestern Montana to visit the sacred battlefield. We will camp along the way at a white sand beach lake in Nebraska — surreal. We might camp in the Big Horn mountains in Wyoming. I still need to do logistics. It’ll be a “quick” 4-day trip, the only cost will be fuel and food, so this won’t be too costly ($3.19 per gallon for 1,000 miles, fuck my life). LOL
Life is moving too fast. 60-hour workweeks are normal now. The camping rabbit hole goes deeper and deeper through my soul. The bucket list might grow. My wife and I want to move to Texas. But like I said, these bucket list items seem too hard to reach sometimes. One day at a time.
The 8th Camping Merit Badge has been earned, and the badge beautifully illustrates the sad inner-most workings of my brain. As a general rule, I am a nice person and I don’t believe in “burning bridges” because you know, that shit will come back to haunt you. You never know. Having said that, I LOVE burning bridges when people do me wrong. I have had a couple of friends in my lifetime who I’ve burned the proverbial bridge with, and my way of lighting those bridges on fire was by disappearing from their lives by changing addresses, phone numbers, etc. Lessons in How To Disappear Completely. Then last week I broke up with my local Mazda dealership where I’d been servicing my Mazda over the last 18 years. They kept taking advantage of me so finally I filled out their damn survey that that persisted I take, and well, I burned that motherfucker to the ground. Needless to say, I’ll never be returning there as long as God gives me breathes to breathe. Anyway — I love my new angry, bitter patch for the Japanese pakkuraba.
This camping trip has three talking points, two of which will be gear reviews in two other posts. So that leaves me with the main topic, and I’m going to get straight to the point: a fish — or lake monster? — dragged one of my rods and reels into the lake and disappeared into the murky depths. I’m not making this up.
Sometime around 2:00 p.m. I was cooking up a couple of big cheeseburgers on my camp stove. After I ate and cleaned up some dishes, I walked down to the shore to find this:
My second rod and reel was about 5 yards away, perfectly erect. Nobody could have stolen it, because I was the only one at the lake — and who in the hell is stealing a cheap rod and reel that’s got a line in the water. Here’s what scares me …. Earlier I caught a 7.47 pound catfish, and although it did knock the rod down from the holder (the shore is rocky and the holders are not firmly in the ground) the rod just sat there and didn’t budge. So if a 7 pound cat can’t move a rod, what in the fuck could drag a rod into the lake, over rocky ground, mind you ….? I don’t know, and it’s going to haunt me forever. It didn’t dawn on me to wade into the lake a few yards and at least see if the rod was hung up on the bottom. I brought extra shoes and I always have 2-3 days of extra clothing, so I could have done that. Honestly, next time I go there I’m going to do just that. Except now I don’t know exactly where I had the rod, maybe I can figure it out from the photo when I get there. The fishing gods must be angry with me, I don’t know. I once had a rod dragged into a pond by a large carp, but the rod was a lot lighter and it was sitting on a grassy bank. This is different. Anyway, here’s proof of said 7.47:
My wife says I look like I’m in Alaska. Nope, just some classic, blustery Kansas springtime weather. I love it.
Overall, a pretty interesting weekend, and the first trip using my molle panel system in the 4R. I don’t really have it figured out yet — it’s one of those things that have no right or wrong way, it’s totally up to the user.
I did add this amazing paper towel holder that I bought on Etsy. It’s pretty great, but I didn’t spend $$$ on these panels for a freaking paper towel system. The molle bags are useful for small things like sleep pad air pumps, Solar lights, chargers, etc.
My top shelf is still not figured. I mean half of the shelf is used for a pillow? That’s dumb. I put a pot set up there that I didn’t even end up using. This will take some time to figure out. I want a defined system and packing pattern — I’m OCD like crazy, and I need my packing system to be sharp and exact.
This concludes the broadcast. I guess next weekend I get the pleasure of buying a new fishing rod and reel. Thanks, fishing gods. That poor thing that dragged it into the lake is the one suffering now. I hope we meet someday soon.
I’m still experimenting with post format, ideas, etc. I thought about giving up my camping recaps but I just can’t. But what I will do here is slim it down, post only the main moments. One such moment is that of the Ran’na earning her seventh camping merit badge: Wile E. Coyote’s business card. I love that dude.
The weather finally brought prevailing southerly winds upwards of 20 mph. Cloudless, gorgeous blue skies. Warm temps reaching the mid-70’s but never warm enough to strip down to short sleeves. I love Kansas.
New camp meal: homemade chili mac! There is a hint of redneck white trash flair about this that I love, but it was pretty easy to make so I thought I’d try. The end result was slightly disappointing. It filled me up but it wasn’t exactly “delicious” — and that’s probably to be expected. I was going to go with steak and rice, but I needed to try this new meal idea. I think I’ve earned a steak for my next trip, but all being said, I loved the experimenting.
I took the Nature Hike Opalus 3 again, against my better judgment. It took me 17 minutes to pitch it, and 3 minutes to take it down because I rolled it up and threw it in the back seat — that tent is impossible to put away in wind. I’d have more fun trying to put toothpaste back in a tube. Also, the tent stakes are cheap garbage. I broke two of them, which is ironic since the ground was slightly moist and the last time it was cold and frozen where I had no problems. Oh well, I’ll get some non-OEM stakes for this tent.
Lastly, I found a great blanket at Sierra Trading Post (I fucking love that store). It was only $20 and it’s gorgeous. Sierra Trading is a great store to find cheap camping items. The place is bad for people like me because they have a lot of impulse items. Tons of dog toys and such. Clothing. Drinking things. Anyway. It was a good camping trip. I’ll be home the next two weekends at least doing mods and maintenance to the pakkuraba.
For Christmas, my wife and son surprised me by getting me the Nature Hike Opalus 3 tent. This tent has been on my Amazon shopping list for a long, long time. I researched it thoroughly, and there are a lot of You Tubers that review this tent — it seems to be fairly popular. Nature Hike are a Chinese company, but they do have their own website where you can purchase their camping gear. I’ll talk about Nature Hike in another post, but for now let’s just see this tent. It sells for $249 on Amazon, a bit pricey by my standards, considering you can get some really quality Coleman tents for under $200. The Opalus 3 comes with its own ground cover (a.k.a. “tarp”) which I failed to photograph, but it is fairly high quality material and does the job.
The tent comes with plenty of stakes, and let me just say two things: they feel and look extremely cheap. But, I hammered them into rocky, frozen Kansas earth and none of them bent. They performed fine.
The tent comes with three color-coded poles. You slide these through the appropriate sleeves, then secure them:
I didn’t even look at the instructions, because it’s not that difficult to figure out. It took me awhile to pitch this thing because it was my first time, and it is freaking enormous.
The vestibule is enormous, and can fit a large camping chair in there, however your head will touch the top. A smaller camp chair may be better if you really want to sit inside. The vestibule can open from both sides, and the door can be rolled up and secured as seen in photo.
The floor material feels extremely lightweight and cheap. The ground mat is made of thicker material. Also, the outer cover, or rain fly is attached to the tent, it’s all one piece. It’s a three person tent but as you can see, I’d not feel too great about more than two adults in it.
Packing the tent away is an unmitigated disaster — it was a nightmare. Since it had frost on it when I put it away, I didn’t even mess with trying to get it in the stuff sack because I needed to let it dry out at home. So this morning I packed it away properly, and let me say it wasn’t fun. If it was this difficult in the comfort of my basement, I can’t imagine doing it on a cold, windy Kansas morning at the lake. The stuff sack is too small, they must have gotten their knowledge from Coleman — notoriously small stuff sacks.
I’d rate this tent 8 out of 10 stars. It gets some points docked for the inconvenience of putting it away. But it is not that difficult to pitch, a single person can do it without issue. It is very spacious, and the vestibule is pretty awesome. The material seems very cheap I must say. And the million dollar question — is it rainproof, does it stay dry — will go unanswered until I camp in the rain. Of all the reviews I’ve seen, they all say it keeps the rain out. I will be using this tent a lot this year, and with practice I’ll get quicker at pitching it and putting it away. Overall, an interesting tent from a Chinese company that might be okay, only time will tell.
I have a bit of a rant, a bone to pick with the sleeping pad industry. For starters, a good sleeping pad is one of those game-changers for camping. There’s nothing worse than sleeping on the hard ground, and nothing better than sleeping on a good, comfortable sleeping pad. However, the prices for these things are astronomical. $200, $300 for some of the more popular ones! My first sleeping pad cost $60 — it’s the Ascend brand from Cabela’s. Of course I have a family of 5, so that puts me $300 in to cover the family. I can’t imagine paying $1,000 for sleeping pads. So here’s my complaint: can you assure me that your $300 sleeping pad won’t spring a leak? Because all sleeping pads have the potential to get poked by a stick or sharp rock, these things aren’t bulletproof. Therefore I refuse to pay buckets of cash for one of these things.
As it stands, I have 3 Ascend pads that won’t hold air. One of them I even patched up and it still leaks. So here’s what I’ve decided to do, I’ll call it The Great Sleeping Pad Experiment. What I’ve done is found countless numbers of cheap sleeping pads on Amazon. Most of these are in the $40 range, some are even as low as $25. I’ve decided that I’m going to buy a different one for probably my next 5 or 6 trips. Most, if not all, are brands of companies I’ve never heard of. So without further ado, here’s sleeping pad #1: Sleepingo
This pad cost $25 on Amazon and comes in one of three colors, I chose green obviously. I aired it up with my Giga pump, but when it came time to close the nozzle (pictured below) the thing just wouldn’t latch, so I had to keep re-airing it up until I finally got it to stay.
The air pad was extremely comfortable. I actually think it felt better than my Ascend pads. It stayed aired up all night, no issues. It was also a lot easier to pack up compared to the Ascend pads. The only problem with my grand experiment is that I’ll not be getting a very accurate idea of how durable these cheap pads are, if I only use them one night and move on to a different one. Regardless, the Sleepingo passed the comfort test and you’re unlikely to find a cheaper sleeping pad anywhere.
In camping terms, 2023 was pretty stable with a trifecta of highlights — I camped in Arkansas for the first time, I caught a ton of huge catfish in my favorite Kansas lake, and I went solo camping with my new Weimaraner in Colorado. Otherwise, it was pretty low key journeys to my usual place. My blog posts here have become predictable in form, to which I apologize: Photo of MLB baseball hat, some words about road trip music; photo of tent setup; a predictable camp meal; some photos of the fish I caught; campfire photo; morning coffee photo …. You get it. I’ll try to do less of those posts next year (yeah, right). Here is what I have decided that I will focus on in The Year Our Lord 2024:
A. Camping Gear Reviews
One of my favorite things to do in all of Life is to get out to the campsite and try new camping gear. The general knowledge is that you are supposed to test it out at home so you don’t get any surprises out in Nature, but I say fuck that, live for the moment. This came to fruition last spring when I camped in my cheap-Chinese-garbage Hewolf tent. It rained and I woke up freezing in wet clothes and wet sleeping bag and blankets. Now obviously I’m not suggesting this is some cool macho thing to do, people can get hypothermia and such. I’m sorry though, I’m not going to set up a new tent in my backyard before a rain storm comes just to test it. I love the unpredictability of using new gear in the wild, and outside of a cold rain storm on a bad tent, nothing that fails is going to ruin my life.
But as far as gear goes, I’m going to focus on what I can afford, which will tilt toward budget-friendly items. The camping gear universe is full of $200 sleeping pads and $700 tents — I’m sorry but I’ll never do that. I also don’t want to purposely use a bunch of cheap crap that sucks. If I can find affordable products with good reviews, I’ll give that a go. I love trying out new gear, so I want to add that to my posts in 2024.
B. New Colorado Views
I already have some ideas for my annual Colorado journey. I have an alpine lake with a sunrise view in mind, and some exploring.
I also have an itch for the Ozarks. I don’t think we’ll go back this year, but there’s something about Arkansas that I love.
C. Try One New Kansas Experience
It may be a new state park, I have one in mind, or it may be renting a cabin at a state park and God-forbid try “glamping” for a weekend. I told my wife this morning we should try it, but it almost has to be on a deplorable weather weekend, otherwise I’d want to be in a tent. We shall see. Seems like a good change of pace though, and I think the whole family would enjoy it.
D. Build The 4Runner
I won’t make it a point of discussion on my posts, but I have grand desires for my 4Runner. Roof rack, ladder, rock sliders, off-road tires .. I plan on owning this beast until I die. God willing.
Happy New Year and thanks for reading this if you do, I swear I’ll try to improve.
The Lantern of Oz 